Healthy Relationships
Teaching young people how to foster healthy, respectful relationships is a critical life skill that will serve them well into adulthood. As parents, guardians, teachers and carers, we play an invaluable role in shaping young people’s understanding of positive relationships. This page provides guidance on maintaining appropriate boundaries with youth, recognising signs of unhealthy relationships and exploitation, teaching relationship skills to young people, and accessing professional help when needed.
Use this page as your guide to relationship education for the young people in your life. Reach out for additional help when needed – you don’t have to navigate tricky relationship conversations alone.
First, we define the central pillars of healthy relationships – open communication, mutual respect, and trust – and distinguish between healthy and unhealthy relationship dynamics. Building self-confidence and positive self-image in youth also enables healthier relationship choices.
For professionals who work closely with youth, appropriate conduct and relationship boundaries must be clearly established and regularly evaluated. Observable warning signs of unhealthy connections are outlined, whether in youth peer relationships or student-educator/mentor relationships.
Don't let abuse go unheard
Don’t be fooled by its subtle nature of abuse as there are many types and can have devastating effects on its victims.
We have developed resources and information around the behaviour, what is it, how to spot it and what can be done about it.
Understanding healthy relationships
A healthy romantic relationship between young people is marked by mutual caring, respect, trust, honesty, and open communication between partners. While relationships at all ages have ups and downs, healthy connections allow both people to feel supported, empowered, independent, and free to be themselves.
Open, honest communication allows partners to understand each other’s needs, set boundaries, and support each other through challenges. Young people in healthy relationships will listen attentively, validate each other’s perspectives, ask clarifying questions, and express disagreements constructively without aggression or manipulation.
Respect means caring about your partner’s wellbeing, honoring their boundaries, supporting their personal growth, and allowing them to retain independence within the relationship. Controlling behavior and pressuring partners into unwanted situations signify lack of respect.
Trust is earned by demonstrating consistent reliability, care, discretion with sensitive information, and honesty. Repeated dishonesty and inconsideration in healthy relationships will erode trust over time.
These relationships can be romantic or professional and should always follow the same ground rules of respect and trust.
While no relationship is perfect, recurring problems like jealousy/possessiveness, frequent arguments, criticism, alienation from family/friends, explosive anger, threats, controlling finances, physical aggression, lack of accountability, and infidelity could indicate an unhealthy or potentially abusive partner relationship. Pay attention to any behaviors making you, and the people you care for, consistently unhappy or unsafe.
Ensuring boundaries
As support workers, mentors, and educators, we must foster positive connections with young people while upholding clear professional boundaries. By outlining appropriate conduct, we model healthy relationships and prioritise students’ wellbeing.
- Use positive reinforcement and age-appropriate language
- Keep physical contact limited to handshakes/high-fives
- Meet with students in public spaces during work hours
- Communicate through work channels on work matters
- Maintain transparency about activities and expectations
- Ask open-ended questions and actively listen
Gaining young people’s trust enables productive working relationships, as long as consistent boundaries are preserved. Bond through shared interests, active listening, and support – not personal disclosures or peer-like camaraderie. Maintain formalities like professional dress, titles, and scheduled meetings.
Inappropriately relaxed boundaries or efforts to gain student favor can be a slippery slope into misconduct. Note red flags like flirtation, meeting privately, unnecessary touching, sharing intimate details/photos, substance use, conditionally bestowing rewards, and concealing communications. Strictly avoid any illegal, dangerous, or compromising situations – and promptly consult administrators around any concerns.
Educating healthy relationships
As influencers in a young person’s life, parents and mentors play a vital role in setting the foundation for healthy relationships. Use the following tips, resources, and constructive conversations to equip youth with the self-confidence and discernment needed to build positive connections.
As parents, guardians, teachers and carers, you should know what the boundaries are and so should the teenagers.
Have open discussions about behaviors that should raise concerns – things like anger issues, controlling habits, possessiveness, gaslighting, violations of privacy/trust, criticism, and signs of dishonesty. Stress that even seemingly small issues tend to escalate over time without accountability and intervention.
It is very important for young people to be able to identify unhealthy relationships as they will not normalise it and realise what is right and wrong for their own relationships.
Young people with strong self-esteem are less likely to tolerate mistreatment from partners and better able to leave unhealthy situations. The more confident a young person is the more they will stand up for what they believe is right.
Help them identify strengths and talents that affirm their self-worth, whether it’s in academia, sport, music or even being funny. People in their teenage years can struggle with how they look and feel so encouraging them to be confident and promoting their skills will progressively help their self-esteem, which will pave the way to speaking up and standing for what is right.
As important it is for relationships to have open communication, it is very important anyone caring for a child has open communication and not stigmatise serious topics. Talks about how young people are feeling should never be swept under the carpet and always approached with openness and seriousness. Topics that may be awkward to approach, such as sexual health, should be well researched so the teacher has the right amount of knowledge on the subject and feels confident to talk about it. Confidence projects confidence, so the more knowledge you have as teachers and guardians, the more this will empower the young person to exercise what they have learnt and feel comfortable to come to you to discuss matters.
For more information on sexual health guidance you can visit here
Help and advice
If you have more questions and need further advice and support or just need to chat to someone, here are our help lines.
Become a critical thinker
As mentors, we want to have the information available to be able to talk comfortably with teenagers and children about tany issues. In order for you to have the best conversations you need the best material for not only them to learn, but so you can learn about the subjects you are approaching, which is why we have our ‘Sharp Thinking Resources’ available to take advantage of.
We have created these lessons and resources to get people thinking differently about situations that can sometimes be seen as negatives and to see how to approach these subjects with education and critical thinking.
